Keeping score

Empaths may be tempted to keep score.
Yes, we are still human, but keeping score is not what we should be doing.
It’s so difficult, helping other people, making a difference, giving so much of ourselves and getting nothing in return.

So often in life, we keep score of what we’ve done for others in comparison to what they’ve done for us. We feel betrayed at those people who don’t “do” as much for us as we “do” for them.
Why do we do this to ourselves?

Do you do things for others with the expectation of being paid back?

You’ve been blessed with the empath gift (and sometimes other gifts) and that means you have a responsibility to help people.

Keeping score is not only exhausting, it’s also the exact opposite of grace. When our favors and acts of service are contingent upon reciprocity, they’re not really gifts at all, are they? ~ Ashlee Gadd

Let go of your expectations of anyone treating you the way you treat them. Let go of the frustration that people simply will not do for you what you do for them. Let go of the resentment of those who have not lived up to your imposed standards on them. Let go of the fear of telling people, “No. I can’t do that for you,” when you simply are not in a good place to help others. Empaths must always take care of themselves first so saying “no” is important and necessary sometimes. Perhaps once you set up boundaries and define who you are and what you are willing and able to do healthily, you’ll be able to recognize when you are over doing it, or, more importantly, when you are doing stuff for others that they really need to be doing for themselves, with your guidance only.

Keeping score does nothing but create negativity. Do things because you want to, because you can, because you are in a good place and because you have a gift,  not because you expect something in return. Allow yourself to be an empath, use your empath gift, make a difference. Ripples in a pond. Watch what happens.

Find friends or even other empaths who are on the same frequency as we are. These can be our friends.
The people we help can not be our friends. There simply cannot be a healthy give and receive balance with people that we have helped.

Meetup dot com is a great place to check for local gatherings of empaths or similar people.
Find a book club, garden club, car club, movie club, anything where you can meet people who are at similar or higher frequencies.
Make friends and acquaintances but never keep score.

“The reward of friendship is friendship itself.” ~Cicero

 

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